Though this was not the post I had initially intended to begin 2017’s archives with, when the idea came to me (after conversation with my boyfriend, obviously), I felt it was appropriate with the influx of go-getters and goal-setters during resolution month aka January.
Do not tell each other “I love you just the way you are“. Maybe in the short term you are making each other feel good, feel loved, and generally giving each other a dose of dopamine, but in the long run, you are doing nothing but damage.
It seems from a very young age we are made to believe that true love is two people loving each other no matter what.
If we allow ourselves to truly believe that we’ll be loved just as we are, how will we progress for our own future, and strengthen ourselves physically, mentally, intellectually, and emotionally? If you were (unhealthily) overweight, but you were told you are loved just as you are, and you believed it, what would motivate you to become healthy?
This is not to say that your sole form of motivation should come from your significant other, that they need to be the one motivating you and pushing you forward. Just like an education complements your own willpower, the words of your loved ones should complement your willpower and goals as well.
Our goals, our dreams, our aspirations, the journey to achieve all those is what makes us better versions of ourselves each and every day. Who you were yesterday, is not who you are today, and if you did anything at all productive in the last 24 hours, you are already a better version of yourself.
As couples, we should encourage each other to keep moving forward.
Yes, I love you just the way you are. Right now, I love you just the way you are, right now. Tomorrow, I will love you the way you will be tomorrow, an improved version of who you are today.
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